Saturday, May 17

this is an excuse for not studying

choices - a gift or a curse?

there are many instances in our lives where we're faced with a tough decision to make. where we find ourselves at the root of two (or more) roads. each welcoming us to traverse it. when we hit this point, we start to make a list of pros and cons. this fork in the road makes us calculate the repercussions of our every decision.

it's difficult being human beings. even the best of us are bound to make mistakes, sooner or later. as the old saying goes, sepandai-pandai tumpai melompat, akhirnya jatuh ke tanah juga (or something to that effect. y'know i'm hopeless at BM). if you're scared of making one then, as jerry said, "you're in the wrong species love. be a dog". jokes aside though, this is the reality, as real as it comes. no matter how scared you are, no matter how terrifying this may be, you've got to move forward. there's no sense in stopping and there's no going back.

sometimes, the situation is clear cut. as clear as crystals, or better yet, diamonds. the right and the wrong decisions are easily distinguishable. the way ahead is there for you. it might not be easy, but it's definitely not complicated.

but what happen when the choices available are fraught with their very own pros and cons? each choice is as good and as detrimental as the next. what are we to do then? do we follow our hearts? or will our heads trump all? will we be satisfied by temporary highs, or are we willing to let go of them for the possibility of a more rewarding -and hopefully permanent- future?

at the end of the day though, the word sacrifice plays a huge role in the choices we make. are we willing to let go of our 8-hour-a-day sleep to become the respectable doctor our society know and admire? how about saying goodbye to the entertaining archaeologist and focus instead on the GS system of said archaeologist? how about no longer relishing on the 15-minute-spike of happiness for a longer-lasting smile-inducing feeling later on?

in this day and age, where people are obsess with worldly trappings and the only school of thought/religion they adhere to is hedonism, it's tough to rise above it all and think of our next destination rather than blindly enjoying this temporary life.

if one can find success in both lives, they should count their lucky stars and thank God. it's what we all pray for, no? kejayaan di dunia dan akhirat.

"f it's a broken part, replace it
But, if it's a broken arm then brace it
If it's a broken heart then face it"

miss able taggy-tag

1. The rules of the game get posted at the beginning.
2. Each player answers the questions about themselves.
3. At the end of the post the player then tags 5 people and posts their names, then goes to their blogs and leaves a comment, letting them know they got tagged and to ask them to play and read your blog.

Starting time: 8.54pm

Name: sara idris
Sisters: 1
Brothers: 1
Shoe size: 5/6/7.
Height: 162/3cm .
Where do you live: pj + cybertown
Favourite drinks: many.
Favourite breakfast: pancakes/rotitelur/tossei(sp?).
Have you ever been on a plane: Yes.
Swam in the ocean: Yes, tak suka tp. all those weird living things around.
Fallen asleep in school: mase est. dpn pn rathi lg. haha.
Broken someone's heart: hopefully no.
Fell off your chair: mase darjah 1. kat bank yg my mum worked in. malu dgn uncle hamid.
Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call: i'd rather sleep la wei
Saved e-mails: Yes and texts too.
What is your room like: ade BIG mirror. junks displayed on the shelf. plus a world map yg tak sempat-sempat tampal on e wall.
What's right beside you: wani
What is the last thing you ate: roti john putrajaya
Ever had chicken pox: once upon a time
Sore throat: selalu. am nursing one right now
Stitches: a few
Broken nose: not yet
Do you believe in love at first sight: no. infatuation at first sight, yes.
Like picnics: sans ants, yes.
Who was the last person you danced with: mase cube party kat pasum. cant remember who.
Last made you smile: jason mraz. and that blooduh kid. setiap hari tgk die.
You last yelled at: farid and anis cause when you're in a moving car, thats the only way to communicate

Today did you:

Talk to someone you like: friends i like, yes. person i LIKE, like, no
Kissed anyone: the finger yg tersepit ade la
Get sick: sore throat + runny nose + kene cucuk ngan wani (though that was yesterday)
Talked to an ex: no exes to talk to
Miss someone: mi mama
Eat: of course
Best feeling in the world: when the stomach is filled and the bed is within sight. pure bliss.
Do you sleep with stuffed animals: erm, no. with stuffed faran, yes. haha
What's under your bed: lots of dust bunnies i presume. never care to look.
Who do you really hate: the people with evil in their blood
What time is it now: 9:07

Randoms :

Q: Is there a person who is on your mind right now: jerry
Q: Do you have any siblings: Yes
Q: Do you want children: one day soon, iA
Q: Do you smile often: i'd like to think so
Q: Do you like your hand-writing: not really. but malas nak change
Q: Are your toenails painted: Nope
Q: Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in: hotel's?
Q: What colour shirt are you wearing: black; warna rasmi
Q: What were you doing at 7:00pm yesterday: dok bebual ngan wanichan n farantan
Q: I can't wait till: i'm 33.
Q: When did you cry last: y'day
Q: Are you a friendly person: not to strangers
Q: Do you have any pets: none

Where is the person you have feelings for right now? – dont know who ive feelings for nmore
Did the last person you held hands with mean anything to you now? – no holding hands. haram!
Do you sleep with the TV on? – no tv. no light. no sounds. my ideal sleeping environment
What are you doing right now? – doing this thing able tagged me. and freezing my butt off.
Have you ever crawled through a window? - nope. but i've climbed to a balcony before.
Can you handle the truth? – sometimes
Are you too forgiving? - in situations that really matter, i think not
Are you closer to your mother or father? – Mak/mi/mother/mum/ummi/ibu/ma
Who was the last person you cried in front of? – i think faran
How many people can you say you've really loved? – parents and a handful of friends. not many i guess.
Do you eat healthy? – def not
Do you still have pictures of you & your ex? - this question is not relevant to me
Have you ever cried because of something someone said to you? – oh God yes
If you're having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to? solitary drives. oh, and back to pj where normalcy is.
Are you loud or quiet most of the time? – louder than some, but not as loud as others
Are you confident? - when i have to.

5 things I was doing 10 years ago..
1/masuk a biru class for the first time in my life
2/ prolly was watching buffy with the family
3/pengawas sesi petang
4/dsukai oleh ustaz sek agame sbb i was the only one that deign to put in any effort in learning
5/makan rojak tahu pakcik yg tolak2 cart tu

5 things on my to-do list today
1/write something meaningful here
2/PBL - blahh
3/call dad
4/confide to someone about something

5 snacks I enjoy
1/super ring
2/salt and vinegar crisps
3/anything w sour cream n onion
4/the hazelnut-wafer thing in that red packy-packy thing
5/oooooh seaweed

5 things I would do if I was a billionaire
1/blanje my fam buat umrah/haji
2/buy a house fo me mum
3/donate to charity
4/invest - so i can be a billionaire again
5/blanje rakan2 makan! makan sedap!

5 of my bad habits
no, this isnt true.

5 places I have lived in
1/jln jerau 5 n 6
2/jln hijau muda 8
3/jln maju jaya 3
4/jln bkt impian 11
5/jln 14/1
oh, and jln cyberia 3

5 jobs I've had
3/main cikgu-cikgu
4/main doktor-doktor
5/main cashier-cashier

5 mangsa i tag (yeeaaaa~)
4/mindmap (?)
5/sesiape je la yg bace this crap of mine

lame on!

"they say wishing for you is like
wishing for snow in southern california
first of all, i'm saying oh my God
you're the reason that i decorate my yard"

Tuesday, May 13

better late than never, no?

"The trouble with being punctual is that nobody's there to appreciate it."
— Franklin P. Jones

"Keeping another person waiting is a basic tactic for defining him as inferior and oneself as superior."
- Thomas S. Szasz

"Punctuality is the virtue of the bored."
- Evelyn Waugh

and to think that one day i'll be working as a doctor.

" And while he wishes he could escape this
But it all seems so contagious
Not to be yourself and faceless
in a song that has no soul"

Thursday, May 1


you know when to stop trying 
when it hurts too much 
when all the nitty gritty 
will bother you so
you know when to step back
when it's no longer right
when it's painfully obvious 
you're not the best 
you know when to let go
when it gets to your heart              
and crushes it to a pulp
you know when to say no
when it harbors jealousy
and breeds envy
you know when to walk away
when it feels like a dozen daggers
stabbing deep in your chest.        

you know.
you're not stupid.
far from it.
you're not blind.
you've been taught better.
you know.
but you're trying to deny it.
trying to make it feel better.

but at what expense?
to what length will you go?
to what extent will you let yourself go?
when you're dying alone out there?
when you're too broken to be pieced back together?
dont be ridiculous.
dont take yourself for granted.
God loves you too much for that.
for all that crap.

so, do the right thing.
so, even if you dont want to.
so, it's not what you wish for.
you be the better person.
rise above it.
overcome the sadness.
conquer your feelings.
walk away .
and move fast while you're at it.
for your own sake.

"i crouch like a crow
contrasting the snow
im crippled and slow
for the agony, i'd rather know"